Just a world passing by

I've been sitting here. Looking at the night sky above. Cold breeze passed by me giving me shivers that are both welcomed and not. The galaxy spread upon my vision as I reminisce our times - both happy and sad - together.

I knew that without you - it would hurt. I just didn't knew that it would be this painful. Some nights, I howl my tears along with the sound of crashing waves and harsh winds. Some nights, I stare at the sky with nothing but silence and tears as my company. Some nights, I don't feel anything at all - which is a welcome respite despite feeling nothing. I just want to feel numb - to feel nothing at all. All I see is gray but why am I still hurting? Tell me, how should I forget?

But I knew - a very strong intuition, that forgetting would be more painful. I don't want to forget how you smile. The smile that can make everything all right. I don't want to forget your voice and how good it sounds when you say my name. I don't want to forget your laugh, yes, your laugh that's intoxicating I don't need a drug. I don't want to forget your warmth, the warmth that makes me feel home and safe. The same warmth I desperately, desperately want, need - just like an oxygen, right now. Right at this moment. Today. Tonight. Forever.

How can you just leave? How?

Why didn't you take me with you? You knew. We both knew. I can't live alone. I want to go with you. Wherever you are. Doesn't matter what world, time or space, I want, need, to be with you.

But I will wait. Because you said, "live". Because you said, "I'll wait". Because you said, "live for me". Because I know you want me to live. So I will live. I will live the best of my life despite the nights that I want to die. I will live my life seeing everything you wanted to see. The nights on the cliff, the lights of aurora, the sunset and sunrise, the smiling faces of kids, the adorable cats on the streets, the me on a wedding dress. I will live through all this. I will live so when we meet, I'll tell you all about it. I'll tell you how it was beautiful and that we need to see it together. Maybe not in this lifetime. But in our lives after this one, and the next one, and the next.

So wait for me.